I’m focused on communicating the idea of “we may think we behave a certain way ALL the time, but it’s probably not so.” For example, if we are asked if we’re collaborative ALL the time, most of us would answer “of course. That’s just the way we are.”
Well, sure, when things are going well…. What about under stress, experiencing a feeling of fear or staring at danger?
To most of us, collaboration is extrinsic. Something that is extrinsic is not essential or inherent to our behavior. To put it another way, it’s not a basic part or quality of ours; it’s extraneous.
A few of us are intrinsically collaborative. Collaboration is part of their person by its very nature. It is part of a their interior being.
For example, they are collaborative when only one person can be chosen for a promotion and it’s not them. They’re collaborative when they’ve already put in 60 hours and they’ve been asked to work the weekend to meet a deadline. Lastly, they’re collaborative even when gossip about them makes it’s way to their ears.
The way to convert a quality from extrinsic to intrinsic is to practice it until it becomes second nature like breathing. Only then will the quality be part of us, regardless of the conditions.